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Palm Beach, Florida          Kellie@KellieOlver.com            877-974-7539

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Warning: Charisma*

April 21, 2015

 

Noun: a divinely conferred power or talent.

Oops, reading the “divine” part in there makes for some confusion, eh? I know, I know. Let’s try that again.

Noun: compelling attractiveness or charm that can inspire devotion in others.

There you go. Now that’s more like it, yes? If you still don’t comprehend its meaning, don’t worry. It is quite common for people to struggle with the meaning of charisma. So how bout we discuss this a bit more? And please allow me to expound on a specific kind that is “personal charisma”.

Personal charisma is not quite the same as charismatic leadership. Although at the base of it, you will find the very foundation is personal charisma. It is a complex collection of sophisticated social and emotional skills which allows individuals who possess them to affect and influence others.

This type of charisma makes one to communicate effectively. This is not just superficial but instead happens in a deep emotional level therefore making solid interpersonal connections. This is the “something special” we sometimes cannot pin point in influential people. You can say it’s the "umami" in one’s personality.

Like I mentioned earlier, personal charisma is made up of different elements. It is not just one whole thing.

One of these elements is having the ability to express genuine feelings spontaneously. This is how moods and emotions of others are affected. I am definitely positive that you have met a person who lights up the room with their presence. That’s the best example of possessing this element!

Making a certain person feel that he (or she) is the only person in the room you are talking to makes for emotional sensitivity. This is part of making an emotional connection with another person by responding to their feelings, making them feel important. Making them feel heard and listened to. This is another elemental ability that constitutes personal charisma.

 

 
But even with the strong emotional reach, a charismatic person has (not always though) very good control over their own emotions. They are in charge and have the ability to temper them when necessary. There is a time and a place as too much or too little emotion can be damaging depending upon the situation. You can almost say such a person is a good actor, a perfect charmer whenever and however he wants to. So it isn’t a surprise that some of the well-known actors in the world are very charismatic indeed!

These 3 points are in fact just a few of the elements making up personal charisma. Although possessing a bit more of each is essentially good, balance is always better. Why, do you ask? Simply put, an over-abundance of expressed emotion without the aptitude to control and shut it down (when needed) can easily cross to attitude problems.

Now, ask yourself if you experience these traits. If you do, well, that’s great! That means you are halfway to being a bona fide charismatic person! If you are not experiencing these traits, well, good news is by reading this article, you are halfway there to learning how!

Until Next Time

Kellie

 

* Disclaimer:

 

 

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