In the first part of our Fearful to Fearless series, we discussed what Fear often is: False Evidence Appearing Real. You know, there are real things in the world to be fearful of such as earthquakes, hurricanes, and illness. These are the things we can be ready for with preparation, education and insurance. That’s how we deal with real world concerns. But most of the fears we harbor are actually not of substance but really of our mind: fearful of getting older; fearful of being alone; fearful of not having enough money; fearful of not being pretty enough or skinny enough or smart enough. And the list goes on. One of the biggest? FEAR OF THE FUTURE
We fear ‘the future’ and that fear freezes us in the present. We become so captured by the million things that could happen, most of them not so happy, that we are unable to function, or take action, in the present. And by not acting we end up not living the life of our dreams, not living to our full potential and worse not living the purpose of which we were designed for. By not taking action, we are limiting what our future can be: a self-fulfilling prophecy based on fear and lack. TAKE ACTION So what does this tell us? Well, for one thing if we want to get from a fearful and frozen state to a fearless and action-oriented attitude, we have to take action!
But that in itself is the problem. We can't take action! Why? Because we are:
2. paralyzed with fear
3. fearful of making a mistake
4. fearful of making the wrong choice
5. terrified of failing
So how do we fix this? What is the fastest way to turn this around for good?
Well, the fastest way is to just do it; just dive right in, taking it one baby step at a time, not thinking about the end result nor how good or bad it is. But again, in some cases, there is still a block in moving forward.
So, the best plan of attack?
IT STARTS WITH MAKING A LIST You might be thinking “REALLY? Make a list? Are you kidding me?”
Nope. I'm not kidding you. For one thing, making a list takes your focus off the fear and on to a task.
Making a list of everyday thing you do and then crossing them off once you
have accomplished them is also oone of the fastest ways to go from feaful to fearless in 30 days or less.
BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF!
Have you ever tried that? Have you ever, first, taken action and made that list and second, followed through with the points to see the outcome? To feel the difference in how you feel and your level of confidence?
There is a method to the gladness! (Note: I did not say madness!). I will explain the success principle further down in the article, so please keep reading. HERES WHAT YOU DO! Make a list every night before you go to bed of everyday things (daily duties) you do on a regular basis such as make your bed, drink your coffee, walk the dog and call your parents. Once completed, cross the actions off your list. At the end of the day, re-read all the things you have done.
YES! IT'S A LOT!
There is a huge sense of accomplishment and quite frankly surprise in recognizing all the “THINGS” you have done during the day. You might even hear yourself say “Wow, I did all that today?”. You may also feel a little tingly inside as the pride of accomplishment starts to swell. That is confidence starting to build. Next, start adding more complex actions to your list such as organizing your receipts for tax time or get on the internet and start looking for that new job you have been wanting to get.
AND DO IT! FOLLOW THROUGH WITH YOUR ACTION LIST. The state DOING gives you momentum and puts you back in the driver’s seat. You are taking charge of your life. You are pulling in your own personal power and saying goodby to fear ordering you around. So, let’s break this down and discuss why such a simple task of making a list can support your journey of fearful to fearless in 30 days or less. To begin with, by identifying, writing down and then crossing off the actions on your list gives you irrefutable proof which confirms your completed daily tasks. You have something tangible in front of your eyes that demonstrates your everyday accomplishments and successes. You have seen in black and white that you are a DOER! Your action taking bolsters your confidence and starts to melt the deep freeze that has been keeping you paralyzed with fear from having the life you want. Graduating from baby step actions
Actions such as list making is a tool used to get us over the hump. A means to the end. The real purpose of this article is to make the transition from fearful to fearless in 30 days or less a more permanent solution for the rest of your life. The best actions are those that make us feel super confident, in control and powerful. If we feel that way, fears of the future will fade away and enjoyment of the now, the present will fill our minds and lives. So how to gain that power and feeling of control and purpose, that fearlessness? If you are the best you can be, you will face the world with tremendous courage and confidence. Sounds fantastic! So let’s talk about how to do that! You need to assess you. Because it is all about YOU. YOU GOT THE POWER! Here is the idea. If you are as good as you can be in body, in mind and in spirit, how can you go wrong? You can’t – but it’s easier to say than to actually do. To do, we need a plan and a program. It starts with understanding your strengths and weaknesses in various areas of your life. Then you (on your own or maybe with a ‘personal power’ coach) could develop each aspect of your being into a better place and work towards the fearlessness you seek. There are many elements that can contribute to a feeling of personal power but these seven cover a lot of the waterfront:
1. Confidence 2. Nutrition 3. Fitness 4. Appearance 5. Style 6. Sexuality 7. Support System
We can read a book (and many have!) about the role and importance of each of the above factors but for now I will give you a brief rundown on the importance of each element.
• The role of Confidence is pretty clear. When you
look at the bright super stars of our world, one thing they have in abundance (or pretend to have really well!) is Confidence. That’s why when they lead, the world follows – they seem to know the way to go! • Nutrition is a classic – you are what you eat. Yes, it is literally true, nothing in your body and mind got there without the process of converting food into You… so it stands to reason ‘good’ food equals good You (and vice versa). • Fitness is turning what we take in into the ability to actually perform at our peak levels. Our bodies are machines and the state of our body affects our minds and our attitudes: amp up that fitness! • The world judges us, and we judge ourselves,
on our Appearance. If we let ourselves go, we are saying that we have given up and that is the opposite of what we want to do! Look after yourself!
• We should look current, appropriate and in Style – this says not just that we have taste and fashion sense but that we still care to look the best we can be and are in tune with today. Everyone wants to deal with a winner: dress like one! • Sexuality is an issue, especially as we age. The sense of vibrancy and contentment that comes from a positive sexuality is important to the impression of power and confidence that we bring to the world. • Our Support System encompasses everything from our close family, to our friends and extended family, to our business associates and mentors, all the way to our spiritual guides and whatever higher being we may embrace. Everything else is about us but we can do so much more if we bring in the positive energy of a broader network of support and encouragement.
Now imagine assessing yourself from 1 to 10 say, on how close you are to your best in each of these 7 areas. The maximum score would be 70 (7 * 10). This is ‘just a drill’ – you can begin the real journey on my new course called Money, Sex and Power, which will be released January/February 2016, but for now,
let’s give it a try. A score of 8 out of 10 (that’s kind of like an ‘A’), on average, would be terrific – so that’s a 56 (7 * 8). Where do you feel you are today? If you haven’t done the math for yourself yet, go back up to the 7 categories and answer the questions now. Let’s say you score yourself at ‘35’. That’s kind of like a C or C minus. You know where you scored well within the seven areas, and where not so well. But you really want to get that ‘A’. So you set a goal to get to that ‘56’ and now you are on your way – target the weak spots, improve the strengths, reassess in 30 days (and 60, 90, 365...). Now you have a roadmap to get from Fearful to Fearless in 30 days or less and it is both easy – break it down into key components and improve improve improve – and hard: there is a lot to learn about how to make those improvements, and how to stick with the program! But why not start and start NOW – tomorrow you are just a day older, make it a day that you get BETTER. Remember, how to get from Fearful to Fearless in 30 days or less starts with taking action. Something as simple as making a list of every day duties, crossing them off and then reviewing all the many accomplishments you made during the day to taking quantum leap actions to giving you that super charged feeling of power, confidence and in control are all part of your personal journey.
It starts with you. Being the best you can be inside and out. And taking action to ensure you are the best you can be in all aspects of your life including fitness, nutrition and appearance. All of which will help give you the confidence you need to lead a fearless life and live the successful, rich, abundant life you always dreamed about. Till next time Kellie Growing younger every day…